Wedding Customs

Cheyenne Berean Church


Biblical Wedding Customs

Age:  Though there is no age restriction mentioned in the Bible, Jewish tradition however prohibited marriage for a man less than thirteen years and a day, and for a woman less than twelve years and a day. The usual age was probably nearer to eighteen years old. Proverbs 2:17, the partner of her youth; Proverbs 5:18, rejoice in the wife of your youth.

 

Selection:  As the Heavenly Father chooses a bride for Adam, Hebrew fathers considered it their duty to choose wives for their sons. In the absence of the father the responsibility of selection was passed to the mother. Genesis 38:6, Judah got a wife for Er, his firstborn, and her name was Tamar; Genesis 21:21, … his mother got a wife for him from Egypt.
 

Betrothal:  The betrothal period was similar to our "engagement." It was however formal and binding. It was undertaken by a representative on the part of the bridegroom and by the bride’s parents. It was confirmed by oaths and accompanied with presents to the bride and to her relatives. A feast celebrated the act of betrothal and the betrothal period could last up to seven years. Genesis 34:12, Make the price for the bride and the gift I am to bring; Genesis 29:20, So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel.


Marriage: Among the Patriarchs when the proposal was accepted, the marriage price paid, and the gifts distributed, the bridegroom was at liberty to move the bride at once to his own home. Usually the marriage took place at the home of the bride's parents and was celebrated by a feast to which friends and neighbors were invited and which lasted seven days. A marriage covenant was entered into and blessings were pronounced. Genesis 24:67, Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah; Genesis 29:22, So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast; Genesis 29:27, Finish this daughter's bridal week; Malachi 2:14, …the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
 

Dress: The bridegroom would put on festive clothing and wear a special headdress. The bride would put on white robes that were often elaborately embroidered. She would adorn her robes with jewels, cover herself with a veil and place a garland on her head. Isaiah 61:10, …as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.
 

Claiming:  Usually in the evening the bridegroom set out to claim his bride with his groomsmen. He was preceded by a band of musicians and accompanied by people bearing lamps. The bride waited anxiously with her companions his arrival. When the groom arrived he received his bride from her parents with their blessings. Judges 14:11, When he appeared, he was given thirty companions; Genesis 31:27, … joy and singing to the music of tambourines and harps?


Processional: The groom conducted the whole party back to his own or his father's house, with demonstrations of celebration. On their way back they would be joined by a party of young girls (virgins), friends of the bride and bridegroom. Matthew 25:1, … ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom; Matthew 25:6, "At midnight the cry rang out: 'Here's the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!'; Song of Solomon 3:11, Come out, you daughters of Zion, and look at King Solomon wearing the crown, the crown with which his mother crowned him on the day of his wedding, the day his heart rejoiced.


Feast: At the house a marriage supper was prepared, to which all the friends and neighbors were invited. The feast could last from seven to fourteen days. The guests were provided with wedding clothes by the host and the feast was enlivened with riddles and other amusements. Matthew 22:4, those who have been invited that I have prepared my dinner: My oxen and fattened cattle have been butchered, and everything is ready. Come to the wedding banquet.'; Luke 14:8, "When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take the place of honor, for a person more distinguished than you may have been invited; John 2:2, and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding; Judges 14:12, "Let me tell you a riddle," Samson said to them. "If you can give me the answer within the seven days of the feast, I will give you thirty linen garments and thirty sets of clothes; Matthew 22:11, "But when the king came in to see the guests, he noticed a man there who was not wearing wedding clothes.


Consummation: The last act in the ceremony was the conducting of the bride by her parents to the bridal chamber, where a canopy was prepared. The bride was still completely veiled. The marriage was then consummated. Joel 2:16, Let the bridegroom leave his room and the bride her chamber; Psalm 19:5, which is like a bridegroom coming forth from his pavilion; Genesis 29:23, But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah and gave her to Jacob, and Jacob lay with her; Genesis 29:25, When morning came, there was Leah! So Jacob said to Laban, "What is this you have done to me? I served you for Rachel, didn't I? Why have you deceived me?"
 

Honey-year: A newly married man was exempt from military service, or from any public business that might draw him away from his home, for the space of a year. A similar privilege was granted to one who was engaged. Deuteronomy 24:5, If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married; Deuteronomy 20:7, Has anyone become pledged to a woman and not married her? Let him go home, or he may die in battle and someone else marry her."

Words Associated with Weddings

Based on the first time printed usage of modern English words, in the Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, Tenth Edition

 

1. Wedding, before 12th century
2. Bride, before 12th century
3. Wife, before 12th century
4. Husband, 13th century
5. Wedlock, 13th century
6. Spouse, 13th century
7. Wedding ring, 14th century
8. Marriage, 14th century
9. Matrimony, 14th century
10. Bridegroom, 14th century
11. Marry, 14th century
12. Divorce, 14th century
13. Dowry, 14th century
14. Nuptial, 15th Century
15. Co-habitation, ca 1530
16. Honeymoon, 1546
17. Bridesmaid, 1552
18. Maid of honor, ca 1586
19. Betrothed, 1588
20. Courtship, 1596
21. Marital, 1603
22. Wedding cake, 1648
23. Alimony, 1656
24. Groomsman, 1698
25. Marriage of convenience, 1711
26. Bundling, 1781
27. Mixed marriage, 1829
28. Trousseau, 1817
29. Betrothal, 1844
30. Wedding March, 1850
31. Civil marriage, ca 1889
32. Common-law marriage, 1900
33. Proxy marriage, 1900
34. Matron of honor, 1919
35. Blind date, 1925
36. Shotgun marriage, 1929
37. Double-ring, ca 1959
38. Open marriage, 1971


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